The Good That Comes from the Bad

 

Reading this post from 2015 is one of those moments in hindsight that I can see God gently and lovingly preparing me for what was up ahead.

I couldn't see it then. All I could see then was that I couldn't be with my children. I loved the 10 years I was home with my babies. I struggled hard with resistance to changing that, but I knew God was telling me to get a job outside the home. As soon as I did, I struggled with depression and guilt. It was hard for me to adjust to the new phase of "working mom." It didn't feel like the right choice. 

But God knew…

God knew that later this same year something painful was going to happen that would start a new and even harder shift in my "perfect" home life.
God knew that four years later, I would face the daunting journey of being a SINGLE working mom.
God knew what adjustments and changes and pain and heartaches were waiting around the corner.
And He invited me to step away from my comfort zone, go where I was scared to go, do what I didn’t want to do, because He knew it was the best plan for me AND my kids. He was preparing me for what was ahead.

And I certainly dragged my heels and lamented the change. 

Now I see it differently. I can't even imagine how much harder the divorce process would have been on me if I had to make ALL those changes then. It would have been overwhelming. Even the TYPE of job I ended up in helped me walk through a journey I never would have guessed awaited me. 

Now I see all those times of disappointment and discouragement as wonderful guiding steps from a Father who cares about me.

 
It’s good to look back on your life and acknowledge those areas where you struggled at the time, but now see God’s clear hand of provision and protection within that struggle! I need to remind myself of those truths every day. Because I certainly will have more struggles and more hard times. Hopefully, I will rest in God's great and loving hands in those moments and know He is working out a better plan.